Well, a lot has happened in the past couple days. But the most interesting portion of it is the day I took my driving test. I finally became a licensed driver on May 24th, 2012, which was a huge accomplishment for me considering how nervous I usually am taking these tests, and that day was no exception. I was sure that I had bombed this test within the first five minutes of being on the road. Why, you may ask? I was so nervous that I felt very twitchy and spastic with my driving. My instructor would give me directions, and I'd either end up hitting the breaks, pressing the gas, or I'd get super confused. I was more nervous than I'd ever been, and I felt so terrible about my tiny mistakes that I was 100% sure it was going to be an automatic fail. I didn't back up straight, I wasn't pulling up far enough to make my left turns, and when I looked both ways, I didn't always look "far enough". I was punching myself in the face with that invisible fist and cussing up a storm inside my head for being so stupid. You blew it. You blew it this time. That's all I could think. You'll need written permission now and have to accomplish another 20 hours of driving, you nervous wreck! I know I made some other tiny mistakes that I can't remember, so they probably weren't even that bad, but still. I was dumping on myself almost the entire time. By the time I was finished up in the neighborhood, I began to accept that I would not get my license. Accept and move on. Try harder next time.
On the way out of the neighborhood, the instructor asked me where I got my orange seat belt pads. I said that I had no idea and that my mom bought them for me. She said, "These are really cute! I need to get something like this for my car!" She then asked me if I was out of school for summer and asked where I go to school, where I'll be transferring, and what I'm studying. I was talking to her calmly and keeping my eyes peeled at the same time, and I was so glad that we could get off of the driving subject for a few minutes because I was starting to calm down. I am no good with silence in the car, and I think she realized that after I had been driving in the neighborhood. When I told her I was studying creative writing, she asked if I wanted to become a journalist. I told her no, just a writer, but that I wanted to go into the publishing business to learn the ropes of how everything works. Then she started to tell me about how she wanted to get some sof her writing published because she had some pretty funny stories to tell, and I said, "Oh, that's really cool!" She seemed interested about my field of interest, which made me smile (:
As we approached the road that the bureau was on, this chick on our right side came out of nowhere without stopping to look both ways, and thanks to driving with my mom and being in the car with Taelor when most of these idiots pulled stuff like that, my reaction time was quick and I slammed on my brakes. As the instructor and I looked at her, we realized this girl was on her cellphone talking. The instructor forcefully threw her finger toward the window, as if trying to shoot gigantic fireballs out of her fingertip and at this stupid girl. The girl drove on, and as we pulled up to the light, the instructor once more threw her finger at the window, and then told me, "You have really good reflexes. That would have been my side too!" So I think the stupid girl actually saved my butt on this test. I guess not all new drivers are as quick when it comes to those kinds of things happening. My adrenaline helped me out a little bit there. Haha.
As we approached the bureau, the lady told me, "Okay, so we're going to parallel park now." Inside, I thought to myself, NO WAY. NO FREAKING WAY. I MADE IT TO PARALLEL PARKING?!?!?!?! HOLY CRAP I MADE IT TO PARALLEL PARKING!!! This was the chance to really redeem myself! I practiced this, so what was there to worry about? Oh yeah, I can think of one thing. Switching gears. I pulled up alongside the cones and put the car in reverse like I should. I began to back in and straighten out when she said, "You aren't going to fit. Pull out and try again." In all my nervousness, I thought that I had put the car in drive, when it was actually still in reverse. So I pressed on the gas and became confused as I realized I was still going backwards. By the time I realized what I was doing, I had already knocked a cone over. My driving instructor unbuckled as I repeatedly apologized for my mistake. She said, "That's alright. It's alright," and got out to fix the cone. Then she had me pull back into the lot. "Do you know how to park?" she asked. "Yes," I replied. So I pulled in and she sat there to score me. "Well, you passed," she said. "I did?" I asked in disbelief. "Yeah! You have some stuff you need to work on, but you're a good driver!" I glanced over at her score sheet and saw that she scored me with an 85%. I couldn't believe my eyes!! An 85? No way!! I had passed!
When I got inside, I told my mom about passing my test. She was ecstatic that I finally did it, and she told me that she had her friends praying for me, and that she also prayed to our deceased relatives and all the saints she could think of. I had to laugh. "Mom, did I really need that much higher power to help me pass this thing?" "It doesn't hurt," she replied with a smile. Gee, thanks, I thought to myself. Because I, alone, wasn't capable. Still, I knew that a lot of people had been praying for me to get my license, so maybe it did work. I kept breathing in and out as the realization set in, and an African American guy sitting a few chairs away from me asked, "Did you pass?" I said yes, and he said, "Scary, wasn't it?" We both started laughing and he told me, "My heart was beating against my chest the whole time." He had some really good energy, which calmed me a little. People with good energy are always great to be around when I'm anxious. (:
I can't help but think that if I had gotten any other driving instructor, he or she would have failed me for sure. So many of them are in bad moods all the time, and they'll look to take off points for anything they can. But like I said, that girl on her cellphone probably saved my butt. I think that when things like that happen on the road, that's the real test of whether you drive well or not. You have to be able to make split-second decisions, and if you don't make them in time, the results can turn out to be really nasty. I'm thankful that I didn't crash her, because not only would I have wrecked the cars, but I could have hurt the nice lady sitting in the seat next to me, or the girl who had not been looking to see who was coming. I would have felt awful if I had been responsible for any injuries to anyone at all.
I'm still a new driver, and I'm still learning the rules of the road. But I know that as long as I take baby steps, and as long as I practice my driving, I'll be okay. It's a scary thing, being able to drive. When you're in that front seat with your hands on the wheel, you're responsible for your life and for the lives of others. It can be a bit unsettling as you set out on the road alone, but hey, driving is a privilege, and it's just something we all have to do eventually.
I'm glad I finally have my license. Although I tend to hold my breath getting out on the road without a parent in the car with me, I know that one day, I'll be asking myself why I was even nervous in the first place.
Thank you, Mom and Taelor, for giving the gift of quick reflexes and fast reaction time!
No comments:
Post a Comment